Kitty Maltravers to the Head Eater

Miss Flaxman

Tabby Hall

To the Head eater of the Attic Sigh athe Man till.

Sir

I am comehanded by Lady Bell Blew— to reform you that the disclosed letters wd. have had the pleasure of waiting on you before, but Mr Scratch our Secondary had the accident of tumbling out of a gig as he was a going to the post with our despatches, and so Sir as he turnd topsy turvy like all the things came out of his pockets — and some was lost — only these letters and two or three more odd things was was picked up by a parson that coudn’t read and he took em to the libra keeper at the Wells and they liad in libra some time — when by good luck who shou’d go in but me and my Lady & Miss Squib and Miss Squib saw em directly and shew’d em my lady and they told Mr Thingume at the libra who they belong’d to — and my lady says — Maltravers says she — disclose these letters and reddress em as I shall tell you, or you may get Mr Scratch to do it. No my lady says I as I have your ladyships admission, I’ll disclose em to the gentleman myself — and so Sir here they are — and pray dont take a Miss that I address you on my own account for I understand that all the other ladys at the Hall send letters for you to put in the Attic Chest and tho I have a very good chest in the attic myself I like to intimidate my Lady in all she does as I have a perdigous opinion of her taste, and so has she of mine I persume or I shoudn’t have the honer to reside over her twilight.

Perhaps Sir you have not been at Bath nor Waymouth lately. If you had you’d have known that my lady when she was there belongd to a Cummitty of taste and every week they prevented some new thing to make the peple mad — and I shoud not wonder if we produced some little thing or other while we are here a purpose for the rest of the ladies to follow the fashion — tho to be sure there isn’t above two of em fit to follow my ladys fashions. The rest of me are just such quitchical figures as Lady Flimsy, my lady’s shabroon at Bryton last year, but they are smart enuff in all conshins for this dull place thats enough to fill one with onnui as Mr Perrwet says. I’m sure I’m grown as nervy as poserbel since I’ve liv’d here —  I had like to have jumpt out of my skin tother night for I come unawares on a sudden upon Miss Nettletops Picter of the Countenance of Sipiho: I’m sure he’s such an ugly gentleman quite wonder she chose his countenance to put in a picter at all, but its all fansy.

But I musn’t write any more now. for my lady is going to dress for a Ball at the Wells — and I must pretend to the duety’s of my compartment.

I remain Sire your Most humbell
Servant to camehand

K. Maltravers

P.S. I hope Sir you wont look upon my corispondance with content, for I am not a person out of the kennell as Mr Perrywet says.